Burch: State of the APEs

Friday, May 10, 2013 at 1:29am
By Michael R. Burch

The “Planet of the Apes” movies postulate a world in which human beings are the victims of a vastly more intelligent but horrifically cruel species. However as the old saw suggests, fact is often stranger than fiction. It seems apparent to me that we live in the state of the APEs (Alpha Prime Europeans). While Tennessee APEs are not nearly as intelligent as they imagine themselves to be, they make up for their low IQs with near-infinite bigotry, intolerance and cruelty.

The ultraconservative APEs who rule Tennessee have certain distinguishing characteristics. First, they are alpha males and females who long to subordinate and dominate everyone else. Second, they consider themselves and their beliefs to be prime, and everyone else to be unworthy of consideration. (For instance, Tennessee’s fundamentalist Christian rulers claim to believe in “freedom of religion,” but would have screaming hissy fits if Korans were distributed and taught in Tennessee schools.) Third, APEs believe that human beings of white heterosexual European stock are vastly superior to other people. This is why they constantly try to give the shaft to homosexuals, Muslims and people with darker skin.

The ruling cabal claim to believe in and prize “smaller government.” But their actions prove otherwise, as they constantly propose and attempt to pass legislation that has no purpose except to advance their rights by infringing on the rights of others. Their favorite targets are gays and Muslims, followed closely by teachers, students, union workers, the poor, the sick and the elderly.

And heaven help the poor animals who fall under their purview. The “Ag Gag” legislation currently awaiting Gov. Bill Haslam’s signature would make it very difficult, if not impossible, for animal rights activists to expose people and organization who abuse animals. Tennessee newspapers have described the pending Ag Gag legislation as “despicable,” “unconstitutional,” “ridiculous,” “immature,” “idiotic” and “mendacious.” But how can we expect APEs to have compassion for animals, when they are so cruel to their own kind?

It’s bad enough that we slaughter and eat animals that are inferior to us in intelligence. The least we can do is make sure that they don’t suffer unduly. But the APEs will have none of that. Like the compassionless primates in the “Planet of the Apes” movies, Tennessee’s APEs seem to relish the exercise of unjust power.

Tennessee’s APEs claim to be “Christians.” But Jesus Christ said, “Whatsoever ye do unto the least of these, my brethren, ye do unto me.” I wonder what the Lamb of God would say about the way Tennessee Christians treat the poor, the sick, the elderly, and so many unfortunate animals?


Michael R. Burch is a Nashville-based editor and publisher of Holocaust poetry and other “things literary” at www.thehypertexts.com.

Filed under: City Voices
Tagged: Michael Burch

97 Comments on this post:

By: Ask01 on 5/10/13 at 4:15

To cut to the last paragraph, most self professed Christians, standing in court accused of such affilliation, would be safe, as there would not be enough evidence to convict them of truly practicing the faith.

By: Loner on 5/10/13 at 5:04

Another fine missive from Mike Burch.

I agree with Mike's observations and conclusion. Southern born-again conservatives have never fully grasped the concept of human rights, therefore, they are incapable of grasping the concept of animal rights.

The Tennessee Walking Horse scandal apparently has "blown over" and the unrepentant sadists are now free to practice their cruelty with little or no fear of any negative consequences.

Once again, the Christians in the state house have proven that they completely missed the message of the Messiah; they claim to be followers of Christ, but their actions suggest that they may be devil-worshipers, not pious Christians.

By: Loner on 5/10/13 at 5:29

What would Jesus do?

Would the Good Shepherd burn the feet of his sheep, so that they could win prizes in some perverted contest, in which the gait of the sheep is artificially altered, by deliberately wounding the animal?

Christ never mentioned animal rights, I suppose; but that does not mean that humans are free to torture, maim and kill animals for sport or for entertainment.

Jesus knew that the concept of human rights was foreign enough...preaching animal rights would have gone over the heads of his followers.

By: Rasputin72 on 5/10/13 at 5:33

Freedom of speech is and will continue to be a driving force in the direction of this country.

Opinions are like assholes, everybody has one.

In my lifetime however, only in the last ten years has there been so many angry Americans
voicing so much resentment towards each other.

Diversity of culture and opinion is going to be an issue that very well be tantamount to the effects of a Depression.

I have respect for Michael Burch as another human and rejoice that I still live in a country that offers a forum for his diatribe (opinion) I would not however embrace anything he presents politically or socially.

I agree that southern christians are a pain in the rump, but compared to the alternative I just
go about my business unimpeded.

By: yogiman on 5/10/13 at 5:48

I must disagree with you on one issue, Rasputin72; I have read where babies have been born without a$$holes and were operated on to make one for them so they could put their crap out like all other men.

You 'hear' a lot about Southern Christians: I'd like to know what the big difference is between the Southern Christians and the Northern Christians. Do they go by two different Bibles?

By: yogiman on 5/10/13 at 5:59

There's an old saying, Mike: All men are created equal but there ain't no two are alike. Even twins are different.

You feel free to make such comments on Tennessee's political and religious leaders but I see no comment about your opinion of the national leaders. Could that be because the state leaders of Tennessee are Republicans and the national leaders are Democrats?

Was it the state leaders that began to deny religion in schools or the national leaders to make such a denial?

If it was the state leaders then we must have 50 different programs on allowing or not allowing religion in schools.

By: Loner on 5/10/13 at 5:59

The Northern Christians believed that African Negroes were human beings...Southern Christians vehemently disagreed....as a result, the protestant churches split into Northern and Southern sects.... the divisions remained, even after the Civil War.

By: Loner on 5/10/13 at 6:06

Promoting religion in public schools violates the US Constitution...the Establishment Clause...all fifty states in the union are bound to abide by the US Constitution....any questions concerning leaving the union were settled in 1865.

By: Blanketnazi2 on 5/10/13 at 6:20

Some people do not realize that the U.S. is not and was not intended to be a "Christian" nation. Therefore, religion has no place in public schools or government buildings. Our founding fathers were deists. Try reading the writings of Jefferson and Paine and acquaint yourselves with the Treaty of Tripoli. Just because you disagree doesn't change history and the facts.

By: Blanketnazi2 on 5/10/13 at 6:23

The same goes with states rights. Our constitution was (and still is) the grand experiment. As we grew as a nation we experimented with how strong the federal government should be and what should be under the control of the federal government vs. the states. The Civil War helped clarify that as well as FDR and the Depression. The Depression proved that federal government involvement was necessary.

By: conservarage on 5/10/13 at 6:27

does Burch get paid to write this tripe? i hope not.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 6:35

Then there are the trolls that wonder what can I say and do to make their selves stand out. Rasputin and yogi always has the answer by repeating their droll each day.

Babies born without assholes.... Indeed. What about the babies born without souls. You two are an embarrassment to all of humankind.

By: Loner on 5/10/13 at 6:36

Mike used the Planet of the Apes movie series in a metaphorical sense. Certainly, there are parallels in real life.

I think of our world as the "planet of the lunatics".

The Latin word for our moon is "luna", the root word in "lunatic". Apparently, nut jobs have been howling at the moon since antiquity.

The earth's only natural satellite is relatively huge, compared to the planet that it orbits...it's about 1/4 the size of the earth and it's gravitational pull is significant....it causes earth's tides.

Biologists agree that the ebb and flow of the tides was a crucial element in the evolution of organisms on this planet.....the descendants of sea creatures, stranded by low tides, were the first to colonize the land. The tides provided the critical selection pressure.

Human beings have always been fascinated by the moon...religions were built around it...our calendars are based upon its cycles.....yes, this is the planet of the lunatics.

And the lunatics have hundreds, perhaps thousands of nuclear weapons ready to go at a moment's notice.....and now they are fighting a global Holy War...over who Abraham bequeathed his lands to, thousands of years ago, in ancient Palestine.... this is pure lunacy.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 6:40

Now conservarge pipes in with a little ditty about nothing. Next we will have big Jugs with little balls barking for his morning need for attention.

By: Loner on 5/10/13 at 6:43

Conservarage, conserve your rage....I think that Mike earns his pay.

If you are so bright and articulate, please post a cogent rebuttal, instead of a snide remark.....let's see what you got, other than personal attacks.

By: bfra on 5/10/13 at 6:52

Loner - Good response! Doubt if conservage can actually write his own name in a coherant fashion.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 6:52

Well put Loner, but the baby from Gordonsville (the one born without a brain) and the silly monk will find your words far over their limited consciousness.

Jugs will groan and howl like a Howler Monkey and fling his feces.

budlight will bless your pea picking heart and then waste taxpayers money.

By: Loner on 5/10/13 at 7:00

I call 'em as I see 'em, kids.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 7:05

You and Burch see em pretty good, Loner.

By: bfra on 5/10/13 at 7:09

Nemo - Bud will throw in her catty insults, then talk about what a good Christian she is.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 7:33


I think has more of a trollope (sic) sound in so called Christian values.

By: BenDover on 5/10/13 at 7:43

Burch leads again with his predispositions and biases.

"I see bigoted people!"

Burch's word view is skewed to the max... his contempt for conservatives ranks with Loners contempt for Southerners. Everything begins with, "Conservatives are meanies" and then it's just in-fill from there on every view and position.

I've heard it said that any new input is so small compared to all the other stimulus you've recorded and processed in your lifetime that it usually is swallowed whole by your predispositions.

It makes sense then that Burch would waste his time and energy and the time of his readers on this aim rather than say offer up any criticism of the Obama administration for covering up their failures in the Benghazi matter... something immensely more timely and important than Burch's scary APEs.

I, too, hope the City Paper is not paying Burch for these diatribes. I believe one should provide for his own soap-box.

By: pswindle on 5/10/13 at 7:59

The right-wing Christians have always been front and center in TN. Religion has always been the measuring point of one's life. But, the unreasonable teaching and behavior of these groups are slowly losing their appeal to the more wise thinking individuals.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 8:05

That is true pswindle. The New South may not be what southerners or looking for.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 8:12

shb are looking for.

How you can correct my, yogi.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 8:14

shb now you can correct me again, yogi. lol

By: yogiman on 5/10/13 at 8:53

Hit it again, dumba$$.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 9:44

Hit what yogi?

Your lack of intelligent, personality, wit, chronic stupidity, lack of imagination to have a coherent come back. There so many things that I could hit you with. I wish you would be more precises as to what to hit you with.

By: yogiman on 5/10/13 at 10:00

Okay, dumba$$.

I was just trying to be kind. What I meant was that little pea sized element inside our skull, between your ears you are using as your brain.

It's pretty evident it's a small pea. Your daddy must have not watered his garden much.

By: bfra on 5/10/13 at 10:11

Nemo - I wondered too? Thought maybe yogi was, as usual, confused & thought he was in a honky tonk listening to music. I have heard, crazy people hear music all the time.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 10:21

" What I meant was that little peas sized element inside our skulls..."

Is this more of yogi's lack of understanding of languish.

LOL you dumb ass dope.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 10:23

I think Burch must have been thinking of yogi, when he wrote: State of the Apes.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 10:25


His 11:00 post confirms his nuttiest state of mind.

By: yogiman on 5/10/13 at 10:30

You've heard? I thought you would know because you was listening all the time, bfra. You're sure posting like it.

By: Captain Nemo on 5/10/13 at 10:35

There he goes again,bfra. When slap in the face with the true nature of his of his inability to comprehend simple thought, he runs to his closet. Or in this moment he changes the subject.

King Dumb of Ass is Paul Wade.

By: bfra on 5/10/13 at 10:52

Heard WHAT yogi?

By: govskeptic on 5/10/13 at 10:54

Must be tough walking through life with as much "white Guilt" and having to contend
with those pesky Christians within our state,as Mr. Burch and a few others possess. Of course, walking in the clouds with the fellow "enlightened" crowd helps out, along with a word processor to reach and recruit the Great Unsuspecting Unwashed.

By: foxman on 5/10/13 at 11:00

Mike, You seem to be the one of low intelligence since you write them same exact article every week. Also, if you hate Tennessee so bad why not move up to one of the bankrupt yankee states where you can pay more in taxes to support your precious social programs for lazy asses that dont want to work?

By: Blanketnazi2 on 5/10/13 at 11:02

foxman, red states take in more federal money.

By: BenDover on 5/10/13 at 11:23

Take out SSI, and Medicare (which are benefits we pay for) and Roads... which are hugely skewed with per-capita calculations and just the opposite is true, Blanket.

By: Blanketnazi2 on 5/10/13 at 12:24

SSI and Medicare are matched contributions and both the employer and employee are legally required to pay. The work programs were also part of a federal program to provide jobs.

By: Blanketnazi2 on 5/10/13 at 12:25

There is no way we could have overcome the Depression without the federal government's involvement. That's why FDR stepped in and was wildly popular for doing so.

By: yogiman on 5/10/13 at 12:26

Well, you commented you heard, bfra, and I was just wondering what you heard. I thought I might want to hear it also.

By: yogiman on 5/10/13 at 12:30


Do those 'red' states take in more federal money with their hands out..., or are they earning it?

By: Blanketnazi2 on 5/10/13 at 12:40

yogi, they receive the most welfare from the federal government. It's a commonly known fact.


By: Blanketnazi2 on 5/10/13 at 12:57


Of the 22 states that went to McCain in 2008, 86 percent received more federal spending than they paid in taxes in 2010. In contrast, 55 percent of the states that went to Obama received more federal spending than they paid in taxes. Republican states, on average, received $1.46 in federal spending for every tax dollar paid; Democratic states, on average, received $1.16

By: bfra on 5/10/13 at 1:00

By: yogiman on 5/10/13 at 1:26
Well, you commented you heard, bfra, and I was just wondering what you heard. I thought I might want to hear it also.

You stupid vile old coot, I stipulated what I heard when I posted the statement. Why don't you just sit & flip your lip, since you don't have sense enough to know what your read & just clutter of the board with stupidity.

By: bfra on 5/10/13 at 1:02

Blanket - yogi is too busy trying to cover his stupidity & lies.

By: Blanketnazi2 on 5/10/13 at 1:06

bfra, I can't believe how oblivious he is to commonly known things. Whew....

By: Blanketnazi2 on 5/10/13 at 1:11

Juggy's kid